During a breakdown before a ballet performance, Andrew Johnson realized just how little he knew about being a parent of a young girl.
He was the provider and occasionally helped around the house, but his wife, Sarah, ran the show until she sustained a brain injury in a car crash in 2018. In those first few months, she had a half-dozen doctor’s appointments a week, couldn’t remember where the silverware was in the kitchen and suffered debilitating headaches. She went from managing the household to staying in bed so she could recover.
Johnson could take care of their two kids on his own. But he admits he had no idea how to do a lot of things to help them navigate life.
This was especially true for his 5-year-old daughter, Dahlia, something that hit him hard before that dance recital. In the past, he was the parent who would show up, applaud and probably shoot a little too much video with his phone. Before this particular recital, Dahlia needed her hair put up in a bun. He’d never done that before. When a mother, trying to help, asked him if he had a clippy, his answer was, “What’s a clippy?”
“I got thrust into the varsity role,” Johnson says.
The only silver lining in all those struggles makes him grateful today.
“One of the beautiful moments was getting connected to my daughter in a way that probably wouldn’t have happened otherwise,” he says.
Photos by Ivan Diaz Photography
Fostering connections
A year later, things returned to normal, mostly, and Johnson had the idea to give other fathers the chance to connect with their daughters the way he did—only without having to experience a crisis first. He organized an event and asked hair, nail and makeup professionals to teach dads how to do all the girly stuff with their own daughters.
It went well, but the pandemic put the possibility of future events on hold. Johnson finally brought it back last year and called it Daddy Daughter Doll Up. The dads at that event even learned how to do a ballet bun so they wouldn’t find themselves in the same predicament Johnson did.
“It’s things that dudes have no experience doing,” he says.
Last year’s event benefited Realities For Children, and members from Johnson’s Business Networking Done Right group covered all the costs. He suggested a donation of $20 per child from the 100 fathers who attended. He thinks this year’s event will be even bigger and better.
At first he felt helpless, like he did at the recital, but he got over that when he realized others thought it was nice he was stepping up. The dance moms didn’t make fun of him, for instance. That emboldened him to start asking for help.
“The moms really liked him,” Dahlia says. “They were super happy to see him help out.”
There were tense moments, of course, but Dahlia remembers her father trying so hard that it made them both shake off the stress.
“We would arrive at practice early so he could do my bun,” she says. “Sometimes we would have to sit there and laugh for a few minutes at how my bun was completely off to one side.”
They got through Sarah’s brain injury, Johnson says, with friends and acquaintances offering help at unexpected times. He called in favors. All of them were crucial, from the Realtor who watched the kids while he took his wife to another doctor’s appointment to the meals people brought them. It’s the same kind of community he curates with his networking business.
“You never know how you’re going to need a network,” he says, “until you really need it.”
Justin “Tennessee” Muse with his daughter at last year’s Daddy Daughter Doll Up.
A new outlook
Johnson is now 42. Sarah still loses her patience at times, mostly because she gets tired easily, he says. But she’s worlds above where she was seven years ago: You probably wouldn’t be able to tell anything was ever wrong.
“If you look at where she was, when she didn’t know how to finish a sentence and spent all her time in bed, it looks fairly miraculous,” Johnson says. “She has less of a filter now, but I kind of like that feature.”
Other dads treasure Johnson’s Daddy Daughter Doll Up events, even though they were born out of hardship. After last year’s event, several approached him and thanked him for putting it on. It turns out that many fathers want to learn those skills for their daughters and never had the opportunity to do so. The time together matters: Dahlia agrees that she feels closer to her father as a result.
“He was seeing what I was doing instead of just showing up to the performances,” she says.
Dahlia does everything herself now. She’s 14, after all. But she looks back at those memories with pride.
“I’m sure, if you really asked him,” she says, “he could do an OK bun.”
2026 Daddy Daughter Doll Up Event
This year’s Daddy Daughter Doll Up will take place from 6-8 p.m. Feb. 20 at Main Event in Windsor. Admission is free, with a suggested donation of $20 per child. All proceeds will benefit ChildSafe. Tickets can be reserved at tinyurl.com/4nrdwp45.
