Do you have a fond memory that stands out from your childhood? It might be the time you got your first fishing rod, a bicycle or, if you were really fortunate, a pony. But for a lot of us, it’s the time we spent with friends and family, especially around the holidays.
That’s why Loveland’s Jayme Bailey and her husband, Wes, have a two-gift Christmas for their son, Nick. He gets a gift from Mom and Dad and one from Santa, along with a filled stocking, every year.
The family has enjoyed many special times because they don’t spend a lot of money on gifts. Instead, they value experiences, time together and creating new traditions.
“Moving to this model has enabled us to see the Dillon Ice Castles, visit Camp Christmas [at the Stanley Marketplace in Aurora], see the Zoo Lights and go to fun Christmas shows,” Jayme says. “In 2016, we had an authentic snowy Christmas cabin experience with a horse-drawn sleigh ride and ice skating in the Rocky Mountain snow.”
Gretchen and Paisley baking muffins.
While those memories have become priceless to the Baileys, Jayme says there was a bonus side effect to the rule of giving few Christmas gifts: Nick, now a teen, still has every gift he’s received since he was 7. Jayme says he still values, talks about and uses them.
“We’re not sending gifts to the thrift store after six months, and we’ve built 12 years of amazing Christmas memories that are worth more than a mound of gifts,” she says.
Traditions for the kids
Erika Michalski and her husband, Dan, of Fort Collins, don’t shy away from gifts, but they’ve found that the true spirit of Christmas, for them, comes through family time. One of Erika’s favorite traditions came about by accident: Their two daughters, Gretchen, 10, and Paisley, 9, stayed with Dan’s mom one Christmas Eve after Erika and Dan put together a set of bunk beds the kids wanted there. The next year, around Thanksgiving, the daughters started asking their grandma about plans for that year’s sleepover.
“She was on board, so the tradition began,” Erika says. “I have heard them mention many times it is one of their favorite parts of Christmas, and it doesn’t have a big, fancy price tag.”
Erika says the kids still meet Christmas morning with the same enthusiasm, bursting through the door to see what Santa left.
“We truly don’t feel like we’re missing any of the magical moments,” Erika says of the kids spending Christmas Eve with their grandma. For them, it’s a part of what makes the holiday special.
The family has another tradition of baking Christmas cookies, which has evolved over the years. It started with standard cutouts but has graduated into anything they want.
“We have had Christmas tiaras and holiday sharks and a hilarious collection of other things,” Erika says.
She and Dan now have a competition each year to see who can decorate the best cookie. They have a date night and make a big show out of separating the kitchen with barriers to block the view of what the other is working on. At first, their daughters picked the winner, but now the contest has moved to social media.
“I’ve been told voting on cookies is a tradition lots of our friends find themselves looking forward to,” Erika says.
The Michalskis also pick one day every winter break to spend together watching as many Christmas movies as they can cram in. They plan ahead and make sure they have enough snacks and easy meals for the day, then they all pile on the couch and start the marathon. They even dress in matching PJs.
“My husband and I are fully present,” Erika says. “We all take turns picking movies and quoting the lines we know and love best, and it’s a day for just the four of us—and our dog—tucked into a time that can feel sort of chaotic.”
Jennifer Amaral-Kunze, owner of Beyond the Mirror Counseling & Wellness in Fort Collins, says the tradition of matching PJs has stayed a favorite in her family for years as well.
“Everyone gets them on Christmas Eve, and it’s something they look forward to,” she says.
With so much in life being uncertain these days, she says traditions have become even more important. For instance, her family participates in Raintree Athletic Club’s Christmas tree gift program each year. She remembers her oldest child getting gifts from a similar program when the family was struggling financially.
“Now that we can, we give back every year,” she says. “Our kids get excited to choose the gifts.”
Magical moments
As a former preschool teacher, Erika knows the problems that arise when a group of youngsters start comparing notes about Santa. In her house, Santa couldn’t have live animals on his sleigh, she says. That meant puppies, kittens and ponies were out.
When one of the other preschoolers came in talking about the puppy they got from Santa that year, Erika and Dan had to dance a bit to get around it.
“I have found that the best way is to be really general whenever possible,” Erika says. “Too many details can trip you up, especially over time.”
The Michalskis never got into The Elf on the Shelf, so they had to explain that one away as well. Mostly, they leaned on the “I guess that’s part of the magic” response, Erika says, “or we ask them how they think something is possible.”
Jennifer Amaral-Kunze and her daughter, Hope.
Erika’s daughters still believe in Santa, and she and Dan are trying to encourage that for them as long as possible. Still, they respect the range of perspectives on Santa and understand why some parents don’t go down that path.
Erika holds a doctorate degree in adult learning theory (andragogy), a master’s degree in higher education administration and a bachelor’s degree in child development. While working in preschools, she had to balance conversations and experiences with the holidays among a group of students with a wide range of religious and non-religious backgrounds. She says she handled it by diverting the focus away from things that were specific to Christmas and instead focusing on what feels special.
“That could be snow,” she says, “or getting to travel to see family, or maybe visiting Santa.”
She says one of the kids’ favorites became the snow.
“There were lots of different ways to consider magic through the lens of snowflakes.”
Jennifer, the therapist, also had a little fun keeping the magic of Santa alive.
“When my oldest started doubting, around 10 years old, we set up a camera to catch Santa in the act,” she says. “The gifts magically appeared on camera after a long wait. It was a magical moment, and I believe in keeping that sense of wonder alive as long as you can.”
